Why Doing the Right Things Aren’t Working

Most people assume change fails because of what they’re doing.

The wrong diet.
The wrong workout.
The wrong routine.

But far more often, change fails because of how the body perceives what you’re doing.

Let me explain, because this may be a new idea for you.

The Same Action, Two Very Different Signals

The same action lifting weights, eating in a calorie deficit, waking up early, going for a run can send two very different signals to the nervous system:

• Safety and capacity
  or

• Threat and scarcity

And the body always adapts to the signal it receives.

This is the missing link between understanding, believing, and knowing.

Understanding Isn’t the Problem. Perception Is.

You can understand nutrition and still overeat.
You can understand training and still push too hard.
You can understand the importance of rest and still feel guilty taking it.

Why?

Because perspective shapes physiology.

Your nervous system doesn’t respond to behavior alone.
It responds to the meaning behind the behavior.

I recently came across these definitions from Jade Teta, and they articulate this perfectly:

• Understanding – You intellectually get it, but the body doesn’t trust it yet.

• Believing – The body can tolerate it, but it still feels uncertain.

• Knowing – The body recognizes this as safe, familiar, and sustainable.

Change doesn’t become real when you try harder.
It becomes real when the nervous system interprets your actions as supportive rather than corrective.

How Most People Approach Change (And Why It Backfires)

Most health and lifestyle changes are framed from a place of fixing:

“I need to lose weight.”
“I need to be more disciplined.”
“I need to get my act together.”

Even “healthy” actions become loaded with pressure.

From the nervous system’s perspective, this reads as:

Something is wrong. Resources are limited. We’re under threat.

And when the body perceives threat:

• Cortisol rises

• Recovery drops

• Cravings increase

• Consistency erodes

You may still see short-term progress.
But it’s powered by stress, not adaptation.

That’s why it never lasts.

Perspective Is the Lever That Changes the Outcome

Here’s the critical shift:

The body responds less to your plan and more to your perception.

The same calorie deficit can feel like:

• Deprivation → scarcity → rebound
  or

• Temporary, supported, intentional → safety → adaptation

The same workout can feel like:

• Punishment → threat → fatigue
  or

• Skill-building → capacity → confidence → resilience

When perspective shifts, the nervous system shifts.
When the nervous system shifts, habits land differently.
When habits land differently, results compound.
When results compound, change happens.
When change happens, a new identity is born.

This is how belief becomes knowing.

What Actually Creates Lasting Change (Actionable)

Here’s how to move this out of theory and into your body.

1. Reframe the “Why” Behind Every Habit

Before asking what you’re doing, ask:

• Is this coming from scarcity or support?

• Am I trying to fix myself or build capacity?

If the answer is urgency, guilt, or fear, the nervous system stays guarded.

Reframe:

• “I’m training to become capable,” not “to burn calories.”

• “I’m eating to stabilize energy,” not “to control my body.”

2. Scale Effort to Safety, Not Motivation

Motivation is unreliable.
Safety is trainable.

Choose habits that feel:

• Slightly challenging

• Clearly doable

• Repeatable even on low-energy days

If consistency requires hype, pressure, or a grind mentality, it’s too big.

3. Pair Action With Regulation

Every action should send a safety signal.

Examples:

• Eat protein before hunger becomes frantic

• Breathe slowly between sets instead of rushing

• End workouts feeling capable—not crushed

This teaches the body: We can do this again.

4. Track Internal Feedback (Not Just Outcomes)

Ask weekly:

• Do I feel more stable?

• Is my energy more predictable?

• Am I less reactive around food, stress, or schedule changes?

These are signs of knowing, even before visible results.

5. Let Identity Follow Experience

Stop trying to be disciplined.

Let identity emerge from repetition:

• “I’m someone who moves daily.”

• “I’m someone who eats in a way that supports my life.”

• “I’m someone my body trusts.”

Knowing always comes after the body feels it.

From Belief to Knowing

Understanding opens the door.
Belief lets you step through.
Perspective is what makes the room feel safe enough to stay.

When actions are interpreted as support instead of correction, the nervous system stops resisting.

That’s when change stops feeling temporary.
That’s when it becomes who you are.

A Grounded Invitation

If you’ve been doing the “right things” but they still feel heavy, forced, or exhausting, the issue isn’t effort.

It’s interpretation.

My work is built around helping people shift how actions land in the body, so fitness, health, and lifestyle changes create safety instead of stress.

Not by doing more.
But by doing what you’re already doing, differently.

Because real change isn’t something you maintain.

It’s something your nervous system recognizes as home.